Ohm
What i realized is that when you enter the heart cave ( as ram dass put it and I understand so much better now) the love that is always dwelling there is the love for your/self. in "Meditation for the Love of it"shespeaks of feelingyour heart space and paying intense attention to the feeling that comes to you when you mediatate- or need to! I too have the panging of the heart that she desribed and wasnt giving it full acknowledgement. I feel it in my heart when I need to go in- taht is my own love calling out to me- my/self calling back to me and tenderly asking for a real relationship. Asking to know "her" to love "her"- so that within becomes without. Asking, yes, for you to sacrifice your time sometimes, and to be a little self/less...ironic, isn't it?
Itseems that we often shy away from going inside because our conditioned selves fear intimacy, fear love. Our higher selves are always right there ready to be embraced fully however soemthing in us wants pain- becaise we don't want to make ourselves too vulnerable and feel an even deeper pain. And this too translates to our relationship with ourself. We don't want to go inside and then let our/selves down- something is in fear of total denial of the love that you are. But the secret is that that thing is only a mindset, a mode of thinking taht you have right now.
Because you already love yourself- deeper and fuller and more beuatifully than you can even realize. Because you are love. It alwasy comes back to the same lesson in relationships- you must love yourself before you love another. We hear it all the time, but who lives it? and what does loving yourself really mean? Loving your/self...? My esoteric separation with the strike of your/self kind of shows the difference I am recognizing. You and your/self must have a loving, dynamic, ecstatic, esoterically romantic relationship. It is the primary focus and is truly what life is all about- and we are taught and conditioned to believe that is selfish to keep us further from the truth. To make us fear ourselves. To make us judge ourselves and look back as if we are self/ish- and then to hate our/selves for it.
In the end, you are waiting for you with open arms. You are all that you seek. And meditation is a call inside.
And because you are love- what you feel in your heart during meditation is a dynamic seeing through- the veeils are lifting- you are shakti- adn when you see that love, you love it- and when you love it you are in recognition of it so it grows stronger. And taht is life- every human and every animal and every plant, every thing that exists lives in what we call love...I have thought how I wish there was a better word to encapsulate that....and mayve that's how we a=started with using something like God and capitalizing it- trying our hardest to give a word the sacredity it deserves. But we can see where that went...and taht is the whole point, of course, that when you realize it, when you really get it- no word does it justice, and so many words are exchangable- yuou realize how many times you used these words devoid of any real meaning and ike a puzzle meant just for you the whole world begins to unlock....and the experience is ironically and magically the same but completely different and perfectly unique of every expression of love-life-God-Being...its a game meant just for *you* as *you* are more of a foreground placed on a ba ckground and not a cut out- you are not separetae from your immediate enviornment or every other person and thing in existance, all depending on how big or small that the witness to this choas of life is- they can see it what we call microscopic is norma and go deeper thanw e have ever imagined- or the opposite and only see us macrocomisly- all it comes back to, the whole point- is that love in your heart taht you feel is the pulse of the whole universe, a stream that flows throug every living thing and is not separate from it, and when you feel its calling that invites you to the most intiate relationship of all- the one with your/self.....managing that ego in the material plane we hav created with unconditonal love- looking outside of ourselves and endearing our weathered egos as children....listening to the love insidie that is trying to heal the world- and letting it do its work-
Posted: 8 years ago
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