▲

2

▼

davidbhayes — 13 years ago — permalink

I always struggle with this kind of question. In many situations, I can't think of any change at all that's occurred; they're all quite subtle. It requires me thinking really hard about what my life was like at a day-to-day level a while ago to start to get a sense of what's changed since I started to meditate.
I think the most valuable change for me is that I'm more skeptical of my first reaction to things. This could be stated similarly as an increase in the space I have around my thoughts and emotions. But essentially, I've learned that most emotions and thoughts aren't really meaningful, and don't really arise for a wise reason. For the most part a feeling is just a set of sensations in the body, a thought just a collection of firings of old prejudices.
What this all means, in practice, is that I'm a lot less quick to get angry, or defensive, than I would in the past. It's not all that long ago that someone suggesting that X or Y was a problem would set me back on my heels declaring that it's better the way it is. Now I, at least, pause for a second and measure my gut reaction with a small willingness to consider that this first reaction, which I may indeed share, isn't necessarily trustworthy. This also makes me much less likely to start yelling when I'm angry, though that does still happen from time to time.

Reply to this post